A wedding guest says she had to prematurely leave a wedding reception after the bride confronted her to tell her she was dressed “inappropriately.” She says she was never informed of the dress code prior to the wedding.
The TikToker, Elisé Brown (@ebrown_rn), posted eight videos on the matter, the first of which has been viewed 4 million times.
For context, Brown says she, her husband, and their kids traveled 2 hours to get to the wedding. The groom is one of her husband’s longtime friends, and she didn’t know the bride, she later reveals in a follow-up. Brown says the invite came to her husband through text message and that all it included was the date, time, and location. There was no mention of a dress code in the message, she explains.
Filming the first video from her car, right after leaving the wedding reception, Brown recaps the bride’s “rude” confrontation.
“We have been here literally a total of 15 minutes, and the bride comes up to me and tells me that my outfit is ‘inappropriate’ for her wedding, and there was a supposed dress code that I didn’t know existed because I never got a wedding invitation mailed to my house,” the TikToker says.
She clarifies in a follow-up that she wasn’t asked to leave the wedding; she left of her own accord.
“‘Typically, I would send people home, but since you came from far, then I’ll let you stay,’” she recalls the bride telling her before formally introducing herself. “I’m not going to stay in situations like that, so I left. I walked out of the venue.”
The outfit in question
Brown posted her outfit in another follow-up. She’s wearing a navy, knee-length dress that features a pink, teal, grey, and white geometric design. Meanwhile, her husband has on a pink button-down shirt that’s tucked into a navy suit.
In the caption of that post, she reveals her outfit wasn’t the only one the bride had an issue with. “My husband was also told they he shouldn’t be in pink or a pink tie and was asked to remove his tie….” she shared.
Did her husband leave with her?
In the comments section, there was some confusion about whether her husband of 11 years chose to stay behind at the reception or leave with his wife.
“Are you saying your husband is still at the wedding?! Girl you drive yourself home, he should have left as soon as bridezilla said something to you! Get your gift and go home!!” one of the top comments reads.
“Ok but I know your husband isn’t still in there. Please tell me,” another said.
In a follow-up, Brown clarifies that her husband, since he was also “out of dress code” and “100% has [her] back,” also eventually left the reception.
Brown says her kids were also at the wedding, as they were “allowed to go.” “He went inside to get the kids together, to diffuse the situation. And then we got in the car and left,” she says of her husband’s whereabouts.
She adds that her husband is “kind of hurt” by the situation since he has been friends with the groom for 20 years.
What do I wear to a wedding as a guest?
The Knot says there are a few factors to take into consideration when figuring out what to wear to a wedding:
- Dress code
- Season
- Venue
- Culture
The most important one, the Knot says, is the dress code. It recommends asking the couple about the dress code if there isn’t one listed on the invitation.
One should also dress with the season and venue in mind. “It was a 3pm Friday afternoon reception. So to me, it read casual,” Brown says in one of the follow-ups. “It was 85-degree weather. That’s kind of why I wore what I wore.”
Brown attended a springtime wedding, and as viewers pointed out, the parking lot in the photo was not a good indication that they were at a formal venue. Therefore, her outfit seemed appropriate for the time and place.
Also, in some cultures and religions, white is not the only off-limits color, and a covered-up outfit may be a requirement.
Again, it is up to the couple to list the dress code and requirements on the invitation and/or wedding website if it matters to them. But if they fail to do so, it’s best to ask.
Brown later got her hands on and posted a photo of the official invitation that they never received from the groom. The required colors were “smokey [sic] gray,” “midnight blue,” “sunflower yellow,” and “crimson red.”
“These 4 SOLID colors ONLY !! PLEASE !!” the invitation reads. “NO PATTERNS (everyone).”
Brown says she would have “happily obliged” and worn one of the required colors had she known about them.
Whose side are viewers on?
An overwhelming majority of commenters sided with Brown and blamed the bride for not sending out a proper invite with a clear dress code listed on it.
“No formal invite = no formal attire. I’m sorry someone had the audacity to treat you like that. I feel like she will be chasing vain things in an attempt for happiness for a VERY long time,” one said.
“Did you tell her it’s inappropriate to text an invite to such a formal event?” another questioned.
Viewers agreed the couple was dressed appropriately for a wedding.
“This looks fine to me? I don’t think I even remember what one singular guest wore to my wedding,” one said.
“Ridiculous!! Take your fine looking selves on a date,” another urged.
‘Made a trip out of it’
She says her family ended up at a Buc-ee’s “about an hour away” from the reception.
“We’re hanging out at Buc-ee’s for the time being,” she says. “We just made a trip out of it.”
In one of her latest follow-ups, she says the groom later admitted that he did not pass along the dress code information to the couple when he texted Brown’s husband. She also says the bride is refusing to apologize for how she handled the situation. Even though she didn’t name and shame the couple, the TikToker says the bride also asked her to “cease fire” on TikTok.
Wrapping up her series, Brown thanks viewers for their support.
“I did not actually expect this video to go as viral as it did,” she says. “The comments, for the most part, do pass the vibe check.”
The Daily Dot reached out to Elisé Brown via Instagram direct message.
@ebrown_rn Part 1 | Got kicked out of a wedding reception for being out of a dress code I didn’t know existed!
♬ original sound – ebrown_RN
Internet culture is chaotic—but we’ll break it down for you in one daily email. Sign up for the Daily Dot’s web_crawlr newsletter here. You’ll get the best (and worst) of the internet straight into your inbox.
